Last year at this time, we were listening to charming British songbirds and bisexual girls and about getting low, low, low, low. No such luck this summer. Nope. In fact, this summer has not yet produced the song that deserves to be playing on everyone’s car radio as they roll through my neighborhood. Pink and Kelly Clarkson were strong through the winter and spring but not pulling through yet this summer; Enimem’s too heavy for beach music; and Beyonce’s going all angel, Halo-ish instead of grinding dirty this year.
Let’s go through some possible candidates, though and we’ll engage in a wee bit of critiquing.
5. Birthday Sex by Jeremih: Maybe the worst song ever? Proof that anyone can apparently throw some words to some beat and make a record.
4. Blame It (On the Alcohol) by Jamie Foxx: Redeemed from being the summer’s worst song by a cameo-laden video. Everyone loves Ron Howard, right? The only thing worse, though, than (non-country or blues) songs about alcohol are songs about birthday sex.
3. Boom Boom Pow by Black Eyed Peas: This song was released this spring and so should be dying a natural death but it just keeps ticking along. I don’t really want to like this song but it’s hard to resist Fergie at her trashilicious best. Plus, William.I.Am mercifully allows us to remember something other than his terrible acting in Wolverine.
2. Day and Night by Kid Cudi: This song was apparently released ages ago (over a year?) but I keep hearing it all over (including blaring from a convertible in downtown Vancouver). So still good?
1. Love Game by Lady Gaga: How can you not love a song that has the lyrics “Let’s have some fun, this beat is sick, I wanna take a ride on your disco stick.” Oh, admit it. You don’t want to love it but you do. At the very least, you’ll be shaking your ass to it at the club this August.
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