urbanmennonite.com

It’s been two weeks so there’s lots and lots of news out there.

• The Amish are coming. They are coming to your state. They are coming for your farmland.  They are taking your jobs.  They are killing dogs. They are being represented by the ACLU. Soon, if they keep fornicating like bunnies, the only people in America will be the Mexicans and the Amish.  Someone should alert Lou Dobbs to this threat.
• Not sure how to interact with them?  Buy their food.  Close your gates. Stop running your cars into their buggies.  Maybe spend the night with them. Approach slowly. Remember, they are just as scared of you as you are of them.
• And for heaven’s sake, stop killing us.  Even if we are implicated in drug smuggling schemes.
• The Mennonites, meanwhile, are growing in Mexico.  Not as fast but maybe we aren’t doing it right?
• Surprisingly, people sometimes want to leave the Army after finding out that you have to kill people.
• Obama is going for the Mennonite/Amish vote.  Good luck with that.  Sigh.
• OK.  The takeaway from the Nickel Mines Amish school shootings is NOT that teachers should carry guns.  Geez.  What’s wrong with Texas?
• Clearly, we are not doing a good job of explaining what Mennonites are.  My personal favorite is that we are “watered down Amish.”
• Apparently the  Amish book of rules (still looking for an actual copy) allows use of alternative energy.