You may be aware that the Mennonite Church is having trouble attracting new people. We could go into a long sociological explanation but let’s not. Because this is a failure of marketing. And so I would like to encourage Mennonite Church USA to follow the lead of the Mormons and the Catholics and create a calendar of sexy men.
(Warning: pure beefcake after the jump)
Clearly, this would expose (ha!) the Mennonite Church to a vast previously untapped audience. It might be made up of mostly women and gay men but that’s fine, right? I mean, I’m taking a second look at the Mormons. And a third and a ….
How hard can it be to find a dozen hunky Mennonite men? Should we limit it to just pastors? Are there 12 sexy Mennonite pastors out there? Hmmm … let me do a quick mental rolodex check. Nope, maybe we better not limit it like that. Bet there’s a bunch of corn-fed candidates in Ohio and Iowa though that could step up and do their missional duty.
(Sidenote: for some reason, November always gets short-changed in these things. November gets the not-as-cute-as-June kitten pictures, the she’s-hot-but-no-Giselle photos and the i’m-rocking-the-70s-porn-’stache model in every calendar I’ve seen. Let’s try not to have that happen here)
So let’s go boys. Strip off those shirts, wax the happy trail, oil up those chests and do your part in making the Mennonite Church a viable institution for the 21st century.
Need some examples?
Here’s the Mormon I’d open my door for (smirk):
And the hottest Catholic priest since Richard Chamberlain swam in an Aussie ocean:
3 responses so far ↓
1 Bob // Jul 17, 2008 at 1:38 pm
I can’t believe that this hasn’t been floated by MCUSA already.
Seriously, Jim? He’d have kittens.
2 Melissa // Jul 18, 2008 at 9:08 am
You are just not right! Though that priest is pretty darn cute.
I went to an all-girl Catholic High School in New Jersey. One year during our obligatory Mass/trip to Confession known as Ash Wednesday - they brought in two priests to hear the confessions of a bunch of wicked Catholic School girls. One was young and cute, and the other was old. The line for confession with the young priest was out the doors. Only four of us got in line to see the old priest.
The religion teacher called us on it too, and said, “Lust” should have been the first sin that all those who went to see the young priest confessed to.
3 urbanmenno // Jul 18, 2008 at 11:53 pm
Ha! That’s funny about the old and young priests.
In one of my classes at a state University, a guy announced he was going to join the priesthood after graduating and we were all like “why? you’re so cute! It’s such a waste! Why not just become Episcopalian?” That last bit offended him I think.
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